Today’s episode is all about how to get the most out of coaching with Mike Bledsoe, CEO of the Shrugged Collective and creator of the Strong Coach program.

Before we move through mike’s story, I want you to imagine a grid with four squares. On our horizontal plane, you have your coachability. On the left, you have low coachability, to the right you have high coachability.

On the vertical plane, you have your coach’s abilities. Down low we have what Mike calls trainers, and as we move up we have true coaches. With this picture in mind, where on this grid do you think you will have the most success?

Top right- where you are coachable and you are working with a real coach.

Where do you think you are you least likely to succeed? Bottom left- where you aren’t coachable and you are working with a trainer who is telling you what to do.

And here’s the wonderful secret to success- you have control over both of these variables. You can both hire a great coach, and do the inner work it takes to be coachable.

Tune in to this episode to hear Mike’s of moving from bottom left, being an uncoachable trainer who only hired other trainers, to the top right where he is now a coachable coach of coaches who consistently hires great coaches for himself.

Oh yea, and we are a company of top-shelf coaches so if you want someone to help you navigate this notoriously difficult time of year so you can start 2019 on the right foot head to beyondmacros.com/services to learn more and set up your free initial call to learn about what we offer.

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In This Episode:

[01:28] About today’s episode.
[03:19] The difference between a coach and a trainer.
[04:05] What it means to be a coach.
[05:56] The concept of coachability.
[07:50] How a business coach positively impacted Mike’s journey to being coachable.
[12:23] One major change you could make to how you think.
[13:35] An important factor on the coachability side that is similar to the speed of implementation.
[15:21] What to look for in a coach.
[16:44] Some other qualities to look for in a coach.
[17:40] The reason you should seek this quality from coaches you hire.

Connect with my guest:

Shrugged Collective

The Strong Coach

Mike on Instagram

Read Full Transcript:

Read Full Transcript

1- 16:25-16:31 And what I know now is if you want to get better at something, get a coach in that area. And there is a coach for everything,

Welcome back to the Beyond Macros Podcast. We are THE sustainable transformation nutrition coaches, and our show will help you on the path to making your transformation that lasts with episodes about nutrition, movement, and the all important art of inner work.

The podcast is one of many ways we help you make a sustainable transformation. A great starting place is our free calorie & macro calculator worksheet which you can find at Beyondmacros.com/worksheet. We have an exciting update to the worksheet coming soon that will help you stay on track- so download your copy now to get early access.

And of course, our coaching is the ultimate way to guarantee your results. Because as long as you do the work and don’t have a pre-existing condition we guarantee you’ll get results.

We’re this confident because we maintain the best client to coach ratio of our competitors, and as our name implies our coaching will take you beyond macros to create the perfect conditions for a transformation that lasts for life.

And very appropriately, Today’s episode is all about how to get the most out of coaching with Mike Bledsoe, CEO of the Shrugged Collective and creator of the Strong Coach program. One of the keys Mike shares to getting the most out of coaching starts with YOU.

Before we move through mike’s story, I want you to imagine a grid with four squares. On our horizontal plane you have your coachability. On the left you have low coachability, to the right you have high coachability. On the vertical plane you have your coach’s abilities. Down low we have what Mike calls trainers, and as we move up we have true coaches. With this picture in mind, where on this grid do you think you will have the most success?

[jeopardy sound]

Top right- where you are coachable and you are working with a real coach.

Where do you think you are you least likely to succeed? Bottom left- where you aren’t coachable and you are working with a trainer who is telling you what to do.

And here’s the wonderful secret to success- you have control over both of these variables. You can both hire a great coach, and do the inner work it takes to be coachable.

Now let’s take this picture in your mind and make it concrete. Mike Bledsoe’s story is one of moving from bottom left- being an uncoachable trainer who only hired other trainers.. to top right where he is now a coachable coach of coaches who consistently hires great coaches for himself.

To start out, you might be wondering what the difference is between a coach and a trainer, and I will let Mike paint the picture about a time when HE was a trainer.

2- 8:52-9:25 I was born with an unusually high amount of I don't know if you would call it discipline. I really am not a fan of that word, but
I've always been
Good long term thinker. I've been good at looking at the big picture. So I was always good at that for myself, not for other people. I was good at that for myself. So here I am eating, really keeping it clean, clean, keeping it tight. And when people aren't doing what I tell them to do, I go, what the fuck is wrong with these people? So that's number one I give you if you're wondering if you're a trainer coach, a trainer is always pissed off at the clients.

Compare that to Mike’s concept of what it is to be a coach, and the difference is clear.

3- 2:06-3:50 a coach is somebody who really is, is really invested in their clients success and are not necessarily attached to any methods in particular and are also somebody who is I see a great coach is someone who's also like a manager if you're talking about health and in particular somebody who's helping someone manage their health and go oh, you know, if you have this problem, you need to go see this person there's like this whole network thing networking thing happening but also the coach is really good at an interested in what's going on the person's life holistically because and looking for the highest leverage item that we can make improvements on. So you go see a trainer and they go Look, I know how to do or know how to coach CrossFit. You know, I know how to train you with
methods from a CSM or maybe jujitsu, or whatever it is they have, like they have this method. And no matter what you show up with, you'd have a toothache and they're going to tell you to squat you know, so and but that's what they know. And so like for the coach, it's like always looking for the highest leverage thing and not being attached to a single
method to get the job done. And it takes a it takes systemic thinking it you have to zoom out of the person's life and you also have to be willing to ask questions that I think most trainers are uncomfortable asking I think a lot of people remain trainers because they are they they want to keep it surface level and the reason most people want to keep things surface level is because they haven't gone deep with themselves yet and a really great coach or somebody who's gone deep with themselves as able to guide their clients to that depth to

And just as important to this story is the concept of coachability. Mike reflects on the time when he was uncoachable.

4 - 21:05-22:24 and I look back at I look back at my whole life
I was not very coachable as an athlete, I was a loner I love training by myself training a group don't want
I would hire coaches to write programs for me but I didn't and there were definitely times in my life there might be a six month stint where I spent time with a coach that really helped me out but
when I was younger I used to get really irritated with criticism I didn't really
I didn't take it well
and so I I grew up with my with my dad always saying I worked for my dad when I was a kid and he's like if you can do it do it right you know what's what's the point and so I do I have been really good at doing things right the first time because that but at the same time when I don't do them well when the criticism hits it definitely feels like my dad was like coming down on me for you know like why wouldn't Why didn't you think about this and so
I've I've gotten I've got peace with all of that now and so I can receive criticism really well now

And like many journeys, Mike’s Journey from the bottom left, the uncoachable trainer, to the top right, the coachable coach who hires great coaches.. was a process. As convenient as it would be for this story to have a clear “aha” moment, that’s just not how it worked. But in hearing Mike’s story, it sounds like having his business coach model good coaching was a very important part of his journey to coachability.

5a - 11:36-12:20 I started working with a business coach
and he was coaching me Yeah, and I go Oh shit, he wasn't telling me how to run my business. Like if he had been a business trainer he would have been like, these are the numbers you need to be looking at and good and you know, just go fill in these these blanks you know, go you know, go go squat your weight and and come back and tell me how it went. You know what I mean? have been a trainer. But the business coach that I hired, was very interested in me, learning about myself, me learning about how business works, and realizing that every business is different. There's definitely key principles that are the same,

5b- 12:47-13:01 I had somebody who was teaching me like, oh, when you talk to your team or someone on your team complaints about those. Oh, you responded like that interesting. Is there another way you could have responded? I go Oh.
sure there's something I could have done differently. If he had have been a trainer. But the business coach that I hired, was very interested in me learning about myself, me learning about how business works, and realizing that every business is different.

I also share this part of the story to highlight a few things about the journey to the top right. Especially that hiring a good coach will undoubtedly help you, but by being uncoachable you will not get all of the possible value out of the relationship with your coach.

6- 20:34-21:04 I was not very coachable when I look back on it I really look at I'm
not upset at myself but I look back and go wow I wasted some money because
I I could have gotten way more out of our relationship had I been more coachable and the truth is I was doing the best I could do like I didn't know what it meant to be coachable yeah the time and I needed that experience to help me to help make me coachable

So let’s talk about that path to coachability. It’s one thing you have absolute control over and power to change. Mike’s path to coachability included many failures.

7- 23:24-23:45I think it took a series of failures series of business failures Oh shit, series of failures, period, failures as an athlete and then failures in business and I think over time I I I realized I didn't know what the fuck I was doing.

And this realization that he didn’t know what the fuck he was doing was huge. Being honest with himself, having the courage to admit that, and to express that to another person is critical to the process.

8- 29:57-31:42 And so every if people are listening, never had an experience where you know, you have go off the grid for days at a time and have people peeking into the deepest, darkest parts of your life until you've had that me I would say that it was experiences like that that made me coachable and in realizing that the power of vulnerability is and vulnerability is what's necessary to be coachable. Yeah, and
my way of getting people clients to be vulnerable is that I'm vulnerable with them. First, there's this thing called the law of reciprocity. So if I give you something then you have this feeling that you should return the favor in some way and so if I share with you vulnerability now you're going to want to share your vulnerability with me and so I've gotten really good at that and that's been helpful but also realizing that in order for me to be coachable if I sit down with a coach and Sam's know the money coach, I go, this is exactly what the fuck is happening is where minds out when I see these things is how I feel, and this is what's happening, what do we need to do? You know, whereas most people, you know, they want to just, you know, if they're having financial troubles, it's more like, Yeah, I just need to figure out how to make more money. Or maybe I need to save some more money and they're talking to some financial specialist or whatever. But if you really want to get help, you have to say, like, this is exactly where I'm at, and then that person can turn you and go, Oh, okay, well, I see where you're at, this is step one, step two, step three, are you open to that? And that's how that type of coaching can happen.

It’s a scary process with massive payoff. This is why I’m always talking about the inner work piece of things. Real change comes when you change the story between your ears. And one major change you can make upstairs is decreasing what Mike calls “speed of implementation”

9- 48:55-49:59 I think I said earlier, a lot of people think they're taking action by thinking about it. Yeah, yeah, well, I thought about it last month, I go, interesting to think you've been spending energy on it, but not it hasn't made it to the outside world. Um,
so called speed of implementation, how quickly you take the advice or anything you've learned and then apply it. I think that's an issue with people is they may go Oh, here's the lesson. Here's what I was told to do. I'll start it's you know, it's Wednesday. I'll start on Monday night. Why the fuck are we waiting for Monday? Why does life start on Monday, you know someone who's coachable like the people who are going to be really successful as soon as they learn about the thing that's going to make the biggest difference in their life.
They do it immediately.

Mike also wanted to share another important factor on the coachability side that is similar to speed of implementation. This factor is your sensitivity to the messages you are receiving. Whether those messages be from your coach, or your self.

10- 50:07-51:28 really sensitive to the message. I think that people are, our culture is conditioned people to be desensitized, and
people. There's just like, waves that messages come in, right? It's like, Matt, you should change your life. You're not living in alignment with you. Let's really supposed to be happening. And that voice comes through. You don't really hear it is it's a feather. The feather lands on your head, like, Oh, it's just a feather. And then you're walking down the street in a brick falls and hits you in the head. You like what the fuck a break just hit me in the head. You mad at the whatever, wherever it came from. And then you get hit by a Mack truck. You like Oh, oh, I learned the lesson. Mack truck. But the people who are coachable, can they hear the feather? Yeah, the feather gently falls on their shoulder and ago Oh, time for change.
And that's that's what I've been trying trying to get to myself as how sensitive can I become to the messages? How well can I listen? I think I think a lot of that comes down to reflection.

Now that we’ve given you some tools and things to think about on the coachability side. Let’s talk about what to look for in a coach. Mike coaches coaches through his Strong Coach program and as you heard at the beginning of the episode has a clear distinction between what it is to be a coach vs a trainer. Mike also has a gift for choosing great coaches for himself. Here is how Mike selects HIS coaches.

11- 3:57-5:00 when I'm selecting a coach, I'm looking for somebody who is
has got some type of they, they've they've figured something out that that I haven't figured out and it's it's obvious in all aspects of their life I go oh wow it's not just what's happening for them in the gym but their home life their their business you know I'm looking for where I'm at in my life right now that's the type of coach I'm looking for and I might have a coach that I really significantly rely on for health and then I might have a coach that I rely on mostly for relationships, but there's definitely overlap and that's how I know I'm having great coaches because there's there's not like a lot of gaps and my and what I'm trying to improve in my life is when between the things because I think more systemically that makes sense and it sounds like a really important part of what it is to be a coach, especially strong coaches an inner work practice, you've done the work yourself. {{Cut out from 16:04}}

Ahh there’s my favorite phrase again...inner work. I love it. You have to do the inner work to be coachable, and so you should hold your coach to that same standard. Let’s talk about a few of the other qualities that are important to look for in a coach.

My favorite that Mike brought up is that a good coach asks great questions.

12 - 24:26-24:51 It comes down to asking more questions you know, and I had a lot of coaches growing up that just told me what to do. Yeah, you know, maybe they're more like trainers and coaches right and so they were there's a lot of telling going on and
i think you know, and maybe that's what that's what led me to be more coachable is being exposed to more people who are asking me questions versus telling me what to do.

We have a value at Beyond Macros, collect the dots before you connect the dots. That comes from asking questions before trying to guide you as our client. And the reason you should seek that out as a client is so that you are guided vs. being told what to do or worse, being forced in to some template.

13- 13:07-14:05 And then also, I got in some, I did a series, a lot of workshops and retreats where I was being coached by people in different realms, I had a relationship coaching point, I've had
just personal development coaches, you know, like spending some time with some spiritual gurus and really looking and seeing what it's like to be guided versus told what to do. And,
and that's when I really, you know, there there was, there was definitely a mom, where I go, oh, coaching is not
program design, and, and yelling at people, right? coaching is really figuring out what's going on and getting really intimate with these people. And a lot of times, simply listening and letting people you know, talk and do have never been listened to before.

Not only should your coach be asking questions, Anybody can do that, Your coach should be actively listening to what you are expressing! When your coach listens, they’ll be able to see your blind spots, see where you’re limiting yourself, and hold you accountable to a vision that you might not even believe is possible.

14- 14:41-15:38 and then when I look at the, when I look at the best coaches online that are doing really, really well. And,and you're one of those people is keeping people accountable, and the about the ability to hold people accountable. It's something that that's, that's not something a trainer does, like a good coach holds people accountable. And I've seen all sorts of different styles of accountability. I was in the military once and I've been in a lot of coaching environments where there was different levels of accountability happening. And in the last couple years, I have been a part of some organizations where the level of accountability and the I will call you out on your shit
is so high that you know, nothing gets swept under the rug, and I go, that's attractive. I want more of that in my life. I want people to call me out of my bullshit.

And to tie the whole room together, I will let Mike explain the connection between coachability, accountability and being a good coach.

15- 17:30-18:32 the accountability piece is huge. And I really I would say in the last year I really got present to what that looks like not as a concept or theory but exactly what it looks like I've watched it in practice and I've been held to a really high standard myself and it's been it's been enlightening and what does it look like
oh if if I say I'm
matching my word to what I do and if and then having somebody who is holding me to that you know if i say i'm going to be here at 859 you know I'm not and I show up at 859 and five seconds ago what happened
Are you are you gonna make a commitment to that not ever happening again and that can only happen in an environment where the person agrees to be coachable and so there's it's a different level there's different levels of coaching that are happening but I think if you want to be the highest level coach yourself, you have to be coachable yourself.

If you yourself are a coach, I highly recommend checking out Mike’s Strong Coach program at thestrongcoach.com . I’ve been following their Instagram account @thestrongcoach and regularly do the lessons and reflect on the wisdom he drops on that account. Whether you are a coach or not, go check out the post from September 27th, 2018 titled “Growth Hacks: Make these 3 lists”. That lesson helped me free up a ton of time and get clear about the work I want to be doing, and how to get rid of the work I don’t need to be doing.

You can also find Mike at the Bledsoe Show podcast. If you want a good starting place check out Episode 74 with little ol’ me!

If you haven’t already, make sure you subscribe to the show so you don’t miss our next episode where I interviewed both Mike Bledsoe and Ashley Bledsoe about their relationship. It’s and Open relationship, and Ashley drops some serious wisdom about how to Open relate even if you are monogamous. The principles can even be applied in close friendships.

Thanks for listening, and I look forward to seeing you again next week.

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